Thursday, July 06, 2006

How do you restart this thing?

I think I need an adjustment or something. Today I am feeling worse than I did yesterday. I'm so depressed I can't concentrate on anything. This is strange because usually, as the morning goes on, I feel better. Not today. I woke up pretty fine and as the day goes on I feel more and more like crying. I hate this.

I am worried because I know I need to get off of this Paxil. All the horror stories I've read and I just don't think it's helping anymore. I'm scared to death of the withdrawals. I should go to the doctor again, but I'm afraid to do it before the wedding. I just want to keep things how they are until afterwards. But then there will be stress during that time, too. I just have to quit being so weak and deal with life on my own, without drugs. Without. ANY. Drugs.

*Gulp*

When I'm down like this, I like to look at pictures of cute animals...

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I seriously wish I were a dog owned by nice people. Wouldn't that be the life? All your needs met, no money worries, sleeping all day... I'm just too fucking lazy, aren't I. Life as a human is just too much work.

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Awwww...lookit thu kewt meeeeeeeeeercats!

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When I'm hot, I should just imagine doing this. Roll, Roll, Roll in der snooowww!

It's not even noon yet. I should really go grocery shopping after work. YUCK. I'll pick up a couple of things, I guess. I don't know. I'm tired. Maybe later, maybe tomorrow. Whatever. At least I'm still alive and have lots of things going for me. Too bad thinking positive doesn't get rid of this LOUSY feeling.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Focus on the positive! Life is rough, we need to have faith in the good things and forget about the sucky things!!! much love xxxxooo