I finally got Sirius

And it's WONDERFUL!!!! My brother helped me install it (well, he did the whole thing, actually) in my car last night. Ahhh...now I never have to scream and turn the channel when the foo fuckers or red hot chili faggots come on 'cause I've got so many options it's rediculous! I'm so glad I finally did it. I can even listen to it on the internet! I will never want for a different mix of music again.

Well, that's about all I'm happy about for now. I had another bad day yesterday. My emotions took over again. I got all carried away with my lonliness. Yep, Ron's back to nights. I'm terrible at masking the fact that I'm VERY PISSED about that.

*rrrrrriiiiiiiiiiing*
*click*

Ron ~ "Hi honey, whatcha doin'?

Bitchy me ~ "Sitting here watching Two and a Half Men...ALONE. AGAIN." *ssssssssssiiiiiiggggghhhhhhh*

Must. Stop. Feeling...sorrrrrry for my...selfff... This isn't going to go on forever, right? I have plenty of things to do, people to see...then why don't I feel like doing it? It's just the big let down. It'll pass and I'll go on with life like I always do. I just wish Ron would try to be more understanding when I need it. I know all about tough love and grin and bear it but, FUCK...it WOULD be nice to get some support when you're down. Even if there is nothing that can be done. Just a few nice words without attitude. Maybe an I don't blame you. Or maybe I didn't hear that part because I was too busy whining and bitching about the inevitable.

*sssssssssssssssssssssssssssiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

And Myspace. Don't get me started on that lame shit. If I don't stop getting insulted by people who don't have common courtesy I'm going to have a fucking aneurism. It's not common courtesty they lack, it's TIME. Stop stop STOP expecting! I was doing so well with that after I dropped Whoreface. I actually looked up her stupid name, 'I rock these red chucks' the other day and it didn't come up. Hmmmm...so I went to a picture she'd left a comment on and saw that there is now a TM at the end of her name. I guess I knew it was coming. She is now one of the OFFICIAL whores of Myspace. She must be so proud. No, I didn't go to her page because I just can't take it anymore. Fuck her. Oh wait, everyone already is! Gawd though, you should see the horrible blog I wrote there yesterday. Another rant about hating people. But saying I hate people only denotes how much I hate myself. I think. I don't even fucking know anymore.

I wish Ron read this damn thing. Then he might be able to understand me more. Ah, but he's a man and has NO INTEREST in learning how to deal with my emotions. No no, that's way too much WORK for him. Heaven's to Betsy, why on EARTH would he do something so demanding as READING? It's all emotional blather to him and he's doing a great job making it clear that that's just what he thinks. But he tries. He does. Then he doesn't see that I'm trying, too. Boy, the first year of marriage is GREAT.

Yea, guess who I just got a call from... Mmmm-hmmm, cover it up and say you're happy honey. I appreciate your honesty. Yup, I'm a big pain in the ass. Thanks.

I'd better stop. I'm getting no where.